Divorce means breakup of a relationship. Though divorce affects the life of husband & wife but we can’t ignore the children. Divorce always come with lots of difficulties for a child and can be very dangerous for him. Divorce is not something that you decide in a day; it is a long & complicated process and it disturbs the child. Child may blame himself or feel ignorance. Studies show that children of divorced parents are more likely to be insecure, may suffer mentally, physically, socially & academically.
Your ability to communicate successfully with your child, meet their needs, for safety and support take care of yourself, and maintain a civil relationship with your ex will have a positive effect on your child. Given the right support, your child will be able express their feelings, grieve their loss, and emerge from this unsettling time a stronger more resilient person.
Effects of Divorce on children
- Children of divorced parents get frustrated & have suffered from Psychological problems like anxiety sadness, moodiness phobia, and or depression.
- They fall behind in studies and become anxious to social gathering.
- Children faced behavioral issues like low self confidence, aggressive nature, cut off from society.
- Most devastating affect on a child is fear of rejection by the remaining parent. If he have new parent he not accept him/her. He feels loneliness in his life.
How to help your child
- Both parents should tell about it their child. Despite your conflicts remember know your child that your affection will not alter, you will always care him and love him.
- If your child blames himself for this situation; tell him that it’s solely a decision between parents. Instead of blaming each other convince him that he is not a reason.
- Give him enough information to deal with what happen in future.
- Behave normally in front of child.
- Take support of other family members, teachers & Psychiatrist to help your child.
- Don’t ignore his routines of meal, homework, play, sleep etc.
- If child behave badly don’t react negatively. Praise him for good things & deal positively.
- Give him time to deal with situations. Allow him to express himself. if they aren’t given the time to heal, it can cause damage later on in life.
- Always speak positive about the Ex- never, no matter how hard it gets, let them hear you put down the other parent: as children they will take this as a personal attack on them.
- Don’t force him to choose between two. Remember he is as much your spouse’s child as much yours. Allow him to meet with your ex-partner.
- Make sure put in an escalation clause for maintenance, so that as the child grows and inflation occurs you will be able to make ends meet comfortably.
So when you decided to take decision about your relationship keep in mind face of your child. The love and caring of both parents are essential for a healthy growth of a child. It is important for both the parents to work things for the benefit of their children.